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S05E08, First Class Jerk

Drama: I actually enjoyed my R&R. And I got some good color. Right, bro?
Vince: Yeah, looking like George Hamilton.
Drama: But young?
Eric: Yeah, yeah. The 50-year-old George Hamilton.

Drama: So, who gets the extra leg room?
Turtle: Vince, obviously.
Vince: No, not obviously. We'll settle it democratically.
Drama: Democratically implies that everyone deserves a voice. My contention is, broke-ass Turtle does not.

Turtle: So it's cool if I call you?
Jamie-Lynn: Wait a couple of days... I'm kidding. Yes, you can call me.

Eric: What are you doing, Drama?
Drama: Just taking precautionary measures. Economy class is a killer that counts the blood clot as a friend.
Eric: And you're gonna prevent one by blowing yourself?

Turtle: Is it that ridiculous?
Eric: You fucking a martian is less ridiculous, Turtle.

Josh: Frank. Darabont. Vince a fan?
Eric: Who isn't?
Josh: Yeah. Shawshank almost makes me wish I did prison time.

Ari: You throw a lot of Jew guilt for a Chinaman.

Lloyd: What's wrong?
Ari: Has so much cum been squirted in those eyes you can't see what's right in front of your face?

Josh: Lots of movie stars do TV! George Clooney did ER, for Christ's sake.
Eric: That was before he was George Clooney. No one goes backwards cause you don't get back to movies.
Turtle: You didn't see Leo in the Growing Pains reunion.

Amanda: If you wanted this job, you would have taken it. But we both know you won't cause you'll miss your little clients too much.
Ari: And we both know that you've already fucked all of yours, so maybe you can move on to bigger and better.

Ari: Wow. You sold me out.
Lloyd: Oh, go ahead and be mad, but I've grown four new ulcers keeping your secrets.

Ari: How does Turtle know Jamie?
Eric: He claims she jerked him on the plane today.
Ari: Oh yeah. I'm sure she's got a fetish for guys who are built like a South Park character.