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Character Quotes

Billy Walsh

Billy: My man, Vincent Chase. Wick was right, you're very fuckable in person.

Shauna: I'm sure it's great. Have you shown it to anybody?
Billy: Me, my editor, and my mother.
Shauna: Yeah? What'd your mother think?
Billy: She thought it was garbage, but she's a fuckin moron.

Billy: I like your newfound balls, Suit.

Billy: "Movie?" You know, I hate the word "movie." I don't make movies, I make films.

Ari: Wow. Cuttin the old fashion way, huh?
Billy: Why fuck a woman with a vibrator when you've got a dick, right, Suit?

Billy: I know we haven't always seen eye to eye, but your support for my vision of this film, for allowing me to make it the right way, has taught me that artists and capitalist pigs might be able to work together after all.
Eric: I'm making very little money for a capitalist pig, Billy.
Billy: I didn't say you were good at it.

Billy: You mind if I use your private shitter? I just gotta piss but the one in the hallway stank like a refugee boat.

Ari: How about a toast? To a groundbreaking day and a possibly groundbreaking movie.
Billy: Are you kissing my ass now, Snake Suit?
Vince: Oh, come on, Billy. He came through. You can't stay mad at him.
Billy: Well, I'm no longer planning on using your car as a toilet, but I'll get back to you about being my agent.

Billy: Somebody grab my fucking luggage!
Drama: You got a lot of bags, Billy? I like a lot of wardrobe changes too when traveling abroad.
Billy: I got one bag, Drama, you fruit cup, but I took three Ambien and I can't lift my arms.

Ari: It doesn't matter what any of you wish cause you are with the master of the universe. And he will deliver a sale of Medellin not to be believed.
Vince: I sure hope so.
Billy: No need to hope, Vince. This film will sell itself. Ari'll be nothing more than a marionette that shakes his head yes or no... or says "double your offer."

Eric: You can call me "E."
Billy: E. Is that your thing, being on time? I won Sundance at 24, what do you gotta say about that kind of arrival, huh?

Eric: You should do a remake of that, Vince.
Vince: No. No one should ever remake that movie. It was perfect.
Billy: You'd let them redo the Mona Lisa, huh, "E?"

Drama: Billy! Yo, am I gonna be happy with myself in the cut?
Billy: Happiness is a state of mind, Johnny. Now, uh... let me get your place. I like your girl better, okay?

Turtle: I got a hot song for Queens Boulevard.
Billy: Thanks but no thanks. I'm scoring the whole thing myself with a sitar.

Billy: I'm not gonna let those douchebags Aquaman-ify my movie!
Eric: Billy, where are you? We're going to come see you.
Billy: Meet me at my girl's. I gotta go home and tell her I lost the rent money again.

Vince: Walsh, what is this, your house?
Billy: No, I'm house sitting for my girl's folks. They made a fortune off ginseng and kombucha drinks. They won't let her see a dime of it though. I'm just praying they drop dead before they raise the estate tax.

Vince: Hey come on, Billy, what do you say? You wanna make a movie?
Billy: I'm making movies, Vince. My way.
Eric: Your way? They're calling you Wally in there.
Billy: Wally Balls is my alias. It's catchy, ain't it? And they gave me a 25-picture deal after seeing me shoot only one scene. Billy Walsh is going to bring the 1970s-type class back to porn, and, the wide bush.

Billy: I need 30. I can't do it for a dollar less than that.
Nicky: I don't have any more money for you, big guy.
Billy: Oh, come on, you probably got the cash out in your car, trust fund baby. Now just pony it up.
Nicky: Stop calling me trust fund baby, you fucking orangutan.