S05E11, Play'n with Fire
Drama: You should have let me take him down.
Eric: I don't think it would have helped much.
Drama: It wouldn't have hurt. I could have shredded his ACL in a flash.
Ari: I'm his manager, you jerkoff.
Verner: How many people does it take to handle one talentless actor?
Verner: I don't understand why they are here.
Ari: Because it's a free country and not Germany circa 1939.
Turtle: I always wanted to open up a restaurant. Good food, maybe some delivery... call it Turtle's.
Jamie-Lynn: Cute. But it doesn't exactly imply speed service.
Ari: Dana Gordon owes me.
Eric: So, you really think she's going to let you replace the director?
Ari: After what I did for her, she would let us double penetrate her if I asked her.
Ari: Half the town is out of work. You can't find me one available director?
Lloyd: Kevin Smith isn't doing anything.
Ari: Are you looking at the DGA list or are you staring out the window at the line in front of the Sprinkles fucking Cupcakes store?
Jamie-Lynn: Why don't you take over this limo business and I will be the driver?
Turtle: Hot girls driving limos. I love that. Call it Lim-hos.
Dana: I am on a plane with John Ellis. I will be on the ground in LA in 90 minutes.
Ari: In 90 minutes you could be back blowing hack writers just to get them to meet you to have a cup of coffee, Dana. Wake the fuck up!
Ari: When you took this movie, Vinnie Chase was attached, and that's how you will finish it.
Verner: Are you threatening me?
Ari: If you consider me telling you that you'll be lucky to get a Der Wienerschnitzel commercial in this country if you don't go back to work, then yeah, it's a fuckin threat.
Verner: Your client will not perform the services that I request.
Ari: My client has performed just fine in every movie he's ever done, including a blockbuster from an Oscar-winning American director.
Verner: Well, this is a film about human beings with layers. It's not about some swimming superhero.
Ari: Well, I don't care if it's a movie about a dancing cucumber. He will deliver. And I need for you to get back out there and help him do that.
Turtle: Why'd you call last night?
Jamie-Lynn: My therapist says I'm attracted to losers.
Turtle: Lucky me.
Andrew: Why are you standing there like you just swallowed a dildo anally, Lloyd?
Verner: Ahh! Who taught you to act?!
Vince: Stop interrupting me!
Verner: Well, make me stop then! Make me believe that what I'm seeing is real! Make me believe I'm not watching a fucking high school play!
Verner: Vincent, this is the most critical moment for your character. His life is hanging in balance both literally and figuratively. We must feel his vulnerability.
Vince: I completely get it.
Verner: Because this vulnerability is what lies at the core of McCabe. Like an onion, without a core, there's no layers.
Jamie-Lynn: Just come over.
Turtle: Is this a booty call?
Jamie-Lynn: When are you gonna learn that talking just gets you into trouble, Turtle?