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S07E07, Tequila and Coke

Jake: I've been refreshing Deadline Hollywood every fifteen seconds like you asked. Nothing about you on there.
Ari: How is that possible?
Barbara: Maybe you're not important enough to warrant a story.
Ari: Deadline Hollywood would run a story about me having a loose stool, much less having recorded tapes of me.

Barbara: Do not go into the lion's den without an invite, Ari.
Ari: I'll be fine. I'll give her a scoop.
Barbara: Oh. You got one?
Ari: Yeah. I'm gonna tell her that you blew Mickey Rooney and gargled with it. She'll love it.

Barbara: I don't think you should talk to her, Ari.
Ari: I think that you know what I think about your thoughts, Babs.

Sasha: You have a couple minutes.
Vince: I'm exhausted. I'm not sure we'd accomplish much in a couple minutes.
Sasha: You relax. I'll accomplish.

Ari: I don't make the rules. Not all of them, anyway.

Ari: If you were gonna send the tapes, you would have sent them already.
Lizzie: Who knows? Maybe five years from now I might be going through a nasty divorce and I might displace my anger at all men towards you.

Billy: Just imagine how your plight as a misunderstood gorilla can move countless angry men.

Dana: What do you owe her, though? Did you fuck her or something?
Ari: I - What is the matter with you? You were the last person I was with before my wife. No one since.
Dana: Wow. That was over 20 years ago. You're actually one of the good guys, despite what they say.

Dana: I'm pushing 40. I don't have a man. I want a baby... with your sperm.
Ari: Seriously?
Dana: No. I'm just fucking with you. I need sperm with thicker hair.

Ari: I love you, Dana. And if I ever cheat on my wife, it will be you I'm fucking.